Saturday, December 28, 2013

SHAME on you Mattel! Do We Need a Plus Size Barbie?

We ask…  Do We Need a Plus Size Barbie?                                        
My answer… if this is all you got, the answer Mattel... is Hell NO!

Let me start my rant with this statement…  I am all for a plus-size Barbie, in fact, I would welcome it for any girl of any size, I mean we have plus sized models heralding plus size clothing lines worn by beautiful plus-size women everywhere… clothes that guaranty to make a women feel beautiful and sexy,  professional, refined, classy, with a hint of MEOW! I don't think that image made the mark at all! It seems like Mattel forced the caricatured extreme onto this beauty of a doll. (who represents a larger percentage of  real women, btw)  If you are going to do plus-size model, then by George, make her life like! 

First I should off by explaining what my issue is… it’s that chin. Honestly I think the doll itself is proportioned nicely. I think she looks beautiful!  Maybe the skirt is a tad too short because one bend over or a brisk wind and it would be labeled Indecent Exposure. Yes, the original Barbie also has a shorter skirt but let’s do the math people… the larger Barbie is going to have a much shorter path in finding reach the gold in them their hills… It wasn’t her body proportions that have me peeved… it was that CHIN!  Not all women who are heavy have triple chins, let alone double chins, and I have seen plenty of average women who have a little extra padding because of this little thing we have on this planet pushing everything down to our toes.. maybe you have heard of it... it’s called gravity?

Now let me be clear in saying that “I am NOT saying it is bad to make this size of Barbie at all” but WHOA, doesn’t anyone else see that the measurements of her chin are waaaay off?  I know a lot of women who sport a bit of a chin and I know women have a chin and a half PLUS… 

It’s a friggen’ doll people!!  So why wouldn’t  you glamourize it up a bit more, you know, how you obviously did for the original Barbie…?  That original Barbie which certainly isn't all that life-like in her size -2, which includes her BMI number of 7. So why not go with the same ‘doll enhancements’ for the plus-size doll to emphasis her beauty?

The tone of this doll screams that if you are rather curvy, then you will be sporting pelican-like features that drape from your mouth like you are packing a giant dukie inside of the diaper-ish draping from the bottom of your nose. 

Plus, come on folks ... it's a doll - not real. Look at the example we got with the original Barbie.  Since you went to the extreme of ultra-skinny size negative -2 that you chiseled out for the original Barbie, it does make sense that the more "extreme image of the plus-size doll’s chin went from supposed-to-be-double/but-went-triple-plus” chin would be right along the lines of your past faux pas...  Ask poor Ken. Boys are still crying in their sleep after that CASTRAT-ophy…  Who is running the store over there? Do you need some help? Perhaps you need to hire some consultants that live on Main Street for advice- not at the Beverly Hills Chop, Tan, Sculpt, and Botox shop.

Needless to say…  I am not happy about this feeble( and thoughtless) attempt at a plus-size Barbie doll. Maybe I just  don’t get it!  I don’t get why the beauty image for any size woman be such a difficult thing for these corporate white-breds to get right? Then again, what am I expecting really because in reality, in the plus-size scheme of things... every pun intended of course… neither of these Barbie’s are anatomically correct...

So if I am to understand this correctly, is this what a plus-size woman looks like glamourized… says the idiots at Mattel’s corporate round table, along with their staff, marketing team, and probably a few  lawyers I would imagine… That is what they came up with?!?   WOW! I am surprised you didn’t add a touch of dumpling on the back of her ass just for the reality of it all… which by the way Mattel...  cottage cheese thighs affect every woman no matter what size that they are-- Idiots!

My question is this… CEO's… are you THAT OUT OF TOUCH? Like have you not had a real date in a while… ? Or are you that friggen’ rich you bought  your arm candy from straight off of the Playboy Mansion lot?  If so, you people need serious help.

Go ahead… Ask a woman… ANY WOMAN. She doesn’t even have to be plus size; in fact, for grins and giggles, let’s just go average, make it a size 12/14. NOT size 18 body with a size GINORMOUS chin… and for Pete’s Sake, put a dress on her… a real woman doesn’t need to dress like a Ho-bag needing to get noticed. She will be plenty noticed by the woman she is; and that part of her body has nothing to do with what you created. So do yourselves a favor and take your Barbie back to the drawing board… Do woman all over the world some justice by showing off the beauty that lies within and without each and every one of us… just as we are!

I just got one thing left to say… in the spirit of good fun… Chin Up! 

MR (with a chin or two standing PROUD in behalf of beautiful women everywhere)